Perhaps there is nothing I worry about more than the preservation of my kiddos–spirit, soul, and body. If there is one constant in my prayers it is that.
When I hear heartbreaking news about children, I usually get an upset stomach. It usually stays upset for the entire day. Along with that upset stomach, I usually begin my own series of silent prayers, “Oh LORD, keep them!! OH, LORD PLEASE keep them! Oh LORD! KEEP THEM!!! Oh, please, LORD, keep them. etc. . .
And usually following my series of prayers or interposed right in the middle of them I think, “But why would the LORD answer my prayer?” I don’t suppose there is a praying mother since Creation that hasn’t prayed the exact same thing. Why would the LORD ever answer my prayer? I cannot boast godliness, prayerfulness, faithfulness. And least of all humbleness. Why would the LORD answer my prayer? Out of the millions of praying moms, why would he choose to hear me?
In our pediatricians office, I saw a picture of a young man in a college football uniform. I asked our doctor who it was. He said, “That was my son.”
“Was?” I thought, but didn’t voice my question.
He then said, “My boy was killed in a car crash at 24 years of age. He was a Christian, he loved the LORD, he was living his life for the LORD. We had gotten through all the hard years. He had gotten through high school. He had made it through college, playing football. He was working at his first job. One morning on his way to work, he was killed in a car/pedestrian crash.”
I started to cry.
He said, “That was/is the biggest test of my faith. We had made it through all the hard years. There was no reason for him to die. He was a wonderful son that was living for his LORD.” Our pediatrician went on to say, “I know that HE has a reason. I accept it. But I can’t say that I understand.”
I cried harder. Then I said, “I pray that the LORD will keep my kids every day.”
My pediatrician said, “I prayed that same prayer, everyday.”
“But how did you make it through?” I asked looking again at the picture of an All-American college football player through my tears.
“Some of Peter Kreeft’s books helped. “Making Sense Out of Suffering.”
That exchange with my pediatrician happened about a month ago, but this week, I heard some disturbing news regarding some children. I was very upset. My stomach got upset, and I started my serial prayer. As we sat down to our morning Bible reading we read from John 17. When we read verse eleven, I stopped.
[JESUS is praying these words] “HOLY FATHER, keep through thine own name those whom thou hast given me. . .”
I stopped reading because it hit me that JESUS has prayed the same prayer that was running through my head all morning. “FATHER keep them.” JESUS understands. HE has prayed that same prayer. HE has felt/feels the same heart aches.
“For we have not a high priest who cannot be touched with the feeling of our weaknesses. . . .Hebrew 4:15”
I didn’t receive a carte blanche promise from my FATHER that my kids would always be kept. But I did receive a promise that “the LORD understands that serial prayer of mine. HE feels it.”
This encouraged me, so I am passing it on.
P.S. Our pediatrician also started Hope Clinic International in Nicaragua in memory of his son Tim. You can click on the blue link to learn more about Hope Clinic International, or you can watch the somewhat long video below.
One more thing. Although I haven’t read the book “Making Sense Out of Suffering” by Peter Kreeft, I did watch some good videos on YouTube. Clicking on the blue link will take you there.
And one more last thing. We love our pediatrician!!!–great medical advice, gentleness with the kiddos, patience with a scared/upset/angry/confused mom (that’s me). We are very thankful to have found him as our pediatrician. We are in good hands.